Saturday 9: Beer Barrel Polka

1) Have you ever danced the polka? – Umm… No
2) Frankie Yankovic was a stellar accordion player. What instrument have you mastered, or would like to learn? – I took guitar lessons for years. I wanted to be Eddy Van Halen and my teacher wanted me to be Roy Clark; there was a fundamental breakdown in communication. I’ve only mastered the playing of one instrument… it has taken daily practice and dedication to various fingering techniques.
3) When Frankie died in 1998, his obituary proclaimed him as "America's Polka King." Lucille Ball was "The Queen of Comedy" and Michael Jackson was "The King of Pop." What royal title do you deserve? – I am Lord Octavius of Mayfair, and shall be referred to as such.
4) Do you like light beer? – Light beer is for people who just like to pee a lot.
5) In 1901, daredevil Annie Taylor successfully went over Niagara Falls in a barrel. She was badly bruised but otherwise fine. How much money would it take for you do to do something that dangerous? – One day Satan himself appears to me and says that he will give me fame, health and wealth in exchange for my eternal soul. I scoffed at him and he snarled at me with flames bursting all around me. He screeches, “I am the Lord of the Underworld, why aren’t you cowering in my presence? I reply, “I was married to your sister for 15 years, nothing scares me anymore”.
6) When was the last time you visited a pet store? – Monday
7) What's your favorite salad dressing? – Depends upon my mood… Ranch, Catalina, Balsamic Vinaigrette Bleu Cheese and Russian.
8) Sam Winters is crazy about her smart phone. She uses it to take pictures, record videos, listen to tunes, answer emails and surf the net and, oh yeah, she even uses it to make calls. How indispensable is your mobile phone in your day-to-day life? – After being off the Smart Phone bandwagon for about 18 months, I recently got back on. It is amazing how often I feel it necessary to check it and I’m using idle time to search for interesting apps.
9) "Kocham cię" is "I love you" in Polish. Can you say "I love you" in a language other than English (and Polish)? --

Blogging Challenge: 16, 17 and 18

** Go HERE for links to previous posts **

16 – NICKNAMES

The earliest nickname I can recall is “Johnny”. I believe this developed amongst my family members as a means to better differentiate between myself and my cousin John, who was about 6 months older than I and most likely was just an easy leap from the practice of using our middle initials as a means of getting our attention. He was/is John A. and I’m John E.

My next nickname memory came from the failed attempt by my best friend at the time to call me “Jack”. I think this was attempted around the time we were learning about President Kennedy and how John and Jack are interchangeable. Honestly, I wish this one had stuck, because I like the name Jack. 

The one that did stick was applied by peers in Middle School; I’m sure there were countless pejorative nicknames, but those are stored in the dark recesses of my repressed memories of that time. My official nickname is “JT”. A brilliant combination of the initials of my first and last name. Many of my lifelong friends still refer to me as such and occasionally some stumble upon it like they’ve arrived at some brilliant discovery. I took much joy in the discovery that my youngest daughter has also been assigned this nickname by her softball teammates. The joy came from the sound of hearing “JT” chanted from the stands as she came to bat, or when she accomplished some great diamond deed.

17 – FAVORITE PIC OF MYSELF OF ALL TIME

I don’t like having my picture taken, so there are very few from which to select. The one to the right was taken in July 2008 after I had lost 100 lbs. Even I have to admit, I look good. Unfortunately, this is when my marriage was falling apart and I was spending 2-3 hours a day at the gym to avoid going home. That fall I began grad school and that level of dedication to the gym was unsustainable and the weight began creeping back. I would really like to look like that again, I know what to do to accomplish it, I just have to Git’er done!

18 – SOMETHING YOU’VE LEARNED

TMI Thursday - Powerball

Some months ago, Sean over at Just a Jeep Guy began TMI Thursdays. Several of the blogs I read regularly participate and I thought I would jump in the pool. With the latest furor over POWERBALL, the multi-state lottery jackpot that was last listed at upwards of $585 million. I buy lottery tickets from time to time when the feeling strikes, regardless of how big the jackpot. But when it gets crazy big, I buy a couple tickets for myself as well as participate in the obligatory office pool. Hope springs eternal that the lightning bolt will strike me. I hear that someone in Missouri and Arizona has a chance to allow their dreams... or nightmares to come true.

LOTTO FEVER - What would you do... or NOT do? **I've actually given this a lot of thought**

1. For your family - I would set up accounts with the Oregon College Savings Plan for each of my kids. That way they have to meet academic criteria in order to access the funding. I would also set up trust funds for each of them that they wouldn't be able to access until they've achieved some level of maturity. But for right now... we would go on vacations. And they wouldn't want for anything.
2. For your Friends - I've watched those "Post-Lottery" shows enough to know that there will be countless "friends" who come out of the woodwork. For those friends who have stuck with me through the last 5 years, those who helped me out of tough spots., those who were there when I needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to listen to me whine... I know who you are. You will share in my fortune.
2a. For my Ex - I would hire a real lawyer and try to reverse the ass-reaming I got in the divorce when I bought into the bullshit that it was all so amicable. I would also have a legal document drafted where I would offer her a a sizable chunk of the jackpot for her cooperation. After all, while she is a hateful, vengeful, angry religious nut... she is the mother of my children.
3. For yourself - The usual... a new car, a condo on the coast and one in the Pearl District in Portland and the ability to travel... I would be able to afford the Lap-Band surgery so I can lose weight become more active, more self-confident and look good for the 25 year old muscle bear I intend to woo. I would be able to afford to gain licensure as a LCSW (Licenced Clinical Social Worker). Since I would no longer have to work I would be able to work on my passions.
4. For Charity - I would set up a foundation that would offer grant funding to organizations that promote GLBT rights, assist people living with HIV and education to prevent the spread of HIV. I would also give a LARGE chunk of money to Basic Rights Oregon as they work to get Marriage Equality on the ballot.
5. For Revenge - Living well is the best revenge.. See Item 2a.

6. For PURE EVIL - In the State of Oregon children in divorce proceedings who are 13 and older are allowed to choose where they live, as a part of reversing the ass-reaming. I would allow my children the right to choose. They weren't allowed that last time. In fact it was written into the mediated agreement that they didn't have that right. As I mentioned... she is an angry, vengeful, hateful religious nut; and after four years it hasn't moderated.  Also, if I can't snare me a sexy muscle bear on my own, I'll buy one. There are plenty of sites when I can find me a rent boy.

POST YOUR TMI ANSWERS
Post and answer the questions on your blog or tumblr page and then post the link in the comments so that others can read your answers, visit your website and get to know you too. I post my answers on Thursday.